. . . that I'm ill suited to be a father.

Have I mentioned that I really don't like kids?

All kids.

Even my own.

Full disclosure, I've never really considered myself a good father. Now, I'm not looking for any sympathy here, or any words of encouragement about my fitness to be a good father. Because the reality is, I'm not a good father. And I'm fine with that.

Truth be told, I prefer dogs. Even the worst of our four dogs, the Louisiana Catahoula named Sam, was better behaved than my kids. Not to mention, cheaper to maintain.

I rejoiced when, at around 22 years of age respectively, each of my daughters decided to fend for themselves and take up residence elsewhere. I saw the beginning of my soon to be retirement years heading my way, where bills were paid, free time was my own, and drama was non-existent. Gone were the days when one was wailing and gnashing about what the other one wore (one was always accusing the other of taking the others clothes - even when no such theft occurred). No more arguments about sharing bathrooms. No more jealousy.

That little sliver of peace and quiet lasted no more than 4 years.

Ever hear of the Circle of Life? It's alive and well and playing out in my house right now, because BOTH kids are back.

And I didn't even want the first one back months ago.

The good news is, I can see an end to the Circle of Life in the near future. My wife and I will be retiring to a life on the road in 6 more years, taking our future RV home from one state to the next, seeing the sights this great country of ours has, and fulfilling my dream of playing golf in every state of the nation before I kick the can one day. Once that happens, the kids will have to fend for themselves, because if they even try to ask us where we are, the only thing we're giving out is the state we're in - nothing else.

Good luck in finding us then.